When it comes sharing sexual fantasies, even the ”closest” couples find it hard to communicate their innermost ”naughty acts” to each other. But if you”re one of those who don”t want to miss out on the fun, then here are few tips to get your mind ”moving”.
Not many couples are able to act out their sexual fantasies even if they are pro in the sack. The problem-How to share your wild thoughts? What would your partner think about you? How would he/she react? Will they comply or not?
Such questions and many others flood the minds of many sexually active adults who want to explore their wildest of sexual dreams, reports Fox News.
While sharing lewd, obscene, or sensuous scenes with your partner can pose to be a big problem, it also has an upside- not only can you divulge your sexual desires but could even get a sneak peek into your lover’’s libidinous thoughts as well.
So if you want to spice things up by sharing it all, sex and relationship expert will prove a saviour for you. And she says that before taking the plunge and share, you should first ask yourself the following questions:
1. What’’s my motivation?
Why do you want to share this fantasy? What turns you on about sharing? Do you hope the sharing can be a form of foreplay or something more? Are you hoping that your fantasy will be fulfilled? Will it be advantageous to your relationship to share, revving up sex for the both of you?
2. Will sharing diffuse my own pleasuring?
Many lovers like to have a few tricks up their sleeves in bed, and their private fantasies are often what makes or breaks the sexual moment. Whether it’’s getting through a sex act or working your way to orgasm, will sharing take away from how your fantasy benefits you now? Will you be able to enjoy having the cat out of the bag?
3. Am I in the right kind of relationship for sharing?
Not every relationship can weather such intimate sharing. You need to be in a secure, trusting relationship. Your sexual union should be able to provide you with the support and safety needed to get over any nervousness and anxiety, and to field any reactions. Lovers need to make each other feel accepted and emotionally safe. This includes being able to refuse a request to act out a fantasy without putting the other down.
4. Can my partner handle my fantasies?
Some lovers can”t handle hearing about certain sex acts, especially if they involve “who” you”re fantasizing about. Partners who are sex negative or uncomfortable with sexual intimacy in general are not going to be the best candidates for such sharing. So consider what your lover may be open to and which types of fantasies may cause more harm than good.
5. Am I ready to hear my partner’’s fantasies?
Lovers tend to expect reciprocity when sharing fantasies. It’’s usually not a one-way street, so you have to consider how you might react to your partner’’s fantasies. Can you go there? How can you provide the same safety you”re hoping for?
After the self-questioning comes the sharing part, so think long and hard about when to open up. And don”t expose a fantasy after a hot romp, for it may not be received as well as one meant to arouse desire.
Let your partner know that you want to share something and explain your reasons for wanting to share.
Finally, remind your lover that your relationship means more than any fantasy. Your partner should not feel undesirable at all. Seeking passion in their love life and wanting to enhance their sexual pleasure, both men and women harbour deep sexual fantasies. While some resemble the regular sex activities, others maybe wild in nature.
Some are even inspired by porn flicks. It's not a bad idea to get down and dirty and introduce some adventure into your sex act by reenacting your sexual fantasies.
We’ve heard much about common sexual desires like making out on a secluded beach, having sex with an unknown stranger, seeing your partner undress in the light and duplicating porn stars etc. But have you ever heard of someone making love in a hot air balloon 1,000 feet above the ground or getting intimate with a fully clad partner in the elevator or storage room?
Dr. Chirta Bakshi, a relationship counselor explains, “Fantasies play a really crucial role in a couples’ sexual life as it can decide on their pleasure quotient. It has everything to make or break their sexual bonding. If fantasies are fulfilled, they can do magic and if not it they can insert trouble in the sexual paradise. The nature of a fantasy also matters because depending on his/her partner's comfort levels -couples can make an effort to execute their fantasies together.”
Here are some never-heard before sexual fantasies that can rock your sex life:
1. Steamy romp using ice cubes : Couples who wish to move away from bedroom boredom can take their sexual act all the way to their washrooms, kitchens or balconies. Some couples love getting raunchy inside a deep freezer with frozen ice all around. "Once in summer, me and my wife decided to get naked and put cover up each other's bodies with ice. As the ice melted it caused tantaslising sensations that turned us on. We also increased the lust quotient by licking and sucking the melting ice cubes from each others' bodies. The heat in our bodies and the cool sexiness of the ice made us scream for more sex," says Subodh Mishra, a 32-year-old advertising executive.
Hidden pleasure : Exchanging body heat with the cool sensations in your body is a great sex stimulant. It might be tough to bear the melting ice, but the process of heating up your partner is sure to keep you charged up.
2. Sexually aroused with a fully clad partner : It’s indeed exciting to witness your partner undressing slowly and arousing for a steamy act in bed. But it can be equally fun to slip between the sheets with a fully clad partner. "I always wanted to have sex with my boyfriend when we were fully clothed instead of routinely ripping off each others' clothes. The hidden pleasure of finding your beau's moan zones through their clothes adds an edge to the love-making," says 27-year-old copy editor Pragya Sen.
Hidden pleasure : As you try to reach and find your partner’s trigger zones, the little hindrances here and there that come in your way, push you to act wilder and make your partner feel even more wanted. Opening his/her buttons or sliding your hands inside their clothes will add to the sexctasy.
3. Having sex in the trial room : This one figures high on the wish list of couples. "I find the urgency of making out in a public place makes me climax like never before. Me and my girlfriend once went clothes' shopping at a unisex store and while trying out the clothes we started to kiss each other passionately. Soon, we had ripped each others' clothes off and were wild. It was hard to keep our moaning down," admits 21-year-old student Deepak Jha. So, tag along your lover for shopping and make sure to call them into the trial room for a secret sex soiree. "The quickie kind of sex is great to pep up one's sexual appetite," he adds.
Hidden pleasure : The fear of being caught at a forbidden location is what pushes couples to enjoy sex like never before. Watching their performance in the trial room mirror or keeping a check of who's standing outside keeps them aroused for a gratifying act.
4. Making out in a hot air balloon : Nothing can be as adventurous as sex combined with an adventure sport. Couples seek pleasure while trying out things like bungee jumping, river rafting or trekking. But imagine flying 10,000 feet above the ground in a hot air balloon - there can be no better chance to get intimate with your partner. Such a fantasy might make you dish out the mullah, but the pleasure is surely worthwhile. "I once had sex with my fiance on a boat when we were out rafting. The cool winds, the open sky and the rocking of the boat made the sex unbelievable. Being naked amidst nature is a great thrill," says 29-year-old teacher Madhavi Malani.
Hidden pleasure : It brings an immense gratification when you can view the whole world, but no one can see you as you indulge in a sexual session with your beloved.
5. Passion heat in a mud pond : Mud fights looks interesting on screen, but when real life couples jump into messy muddy pools with their lovers, it can certainly add to their sexual pleasure. It’s indeed a crazy fantasy to perform the act in a messy place, but the urge to get wild is what encourages couples to think out-of-the-box and enjoy sexual bliss. "There was some construction work going on in our compound that left the area extremely messy. Once after a vicious fight, we just got wild rolling in the mud and ripping off each others' clothes. It was a stimulating experience to get so wild. So much better than a predictable sex on the bed with clean sheets. After the romp, we had a bath together and that got us lustful for more hot sex," says 34-year-old lawyer Ram Chandra.
Hidden pleasure : As couples get all messy and dirty, they take extra pleasure in wiping the mud off from their partner’s body through their tender touches. These little gestures are a perfect way to stimulate their moan zones for a better performance.
| < Prev |
|---|
